Since Donald Trump assumed the presidency in January 2017 it has seemed as though he will never take the threat of climate change seriously. His blatant disregard for climate science and the environment has drawn the ire of scientists and laypeople alike. However, it now seems that climate scientists finally found the best way to get the president’s attention: it’s all about the Stormys.
A prominent climate scientist, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, recently told The Byzantine that the climate change community has finally gotten President Trump’s administration to draft a bold plan to tackle the global threat of rising temperatures.
“All it took for us was telling him that these horrible Stormys he’s been dealing with are only going to get stronger and more frequent,” the scientist said. “That seemed to catch his attention pretty quickly.”
President Trump has a known fear of Stormys, being willing to throw large sums of money at them in an attempt to make them go away; however, even with relatively small Stormys, he has been largely unsuccessful.
“It really all seems to be in perspective for him now,” the scientist added. “He truly seems to understand that the Stormys he’s been dealing with for years are just the beginning. In the future they will be bigger, stronger, and have much more competent lawyers.”
News of the administration’s about-face on climate change comes as Stormy Daniels, one of the most powerful Stormys currently barreling towards the US mainland, increased in strength due to a swell of Avenatti political current. At press time, President Trump was asking a top aide if he could take his motorboat out into Stormy Daniels “just one last time.”